Although some may think that older people and buying Christmas gifts and toys online may not go hand in hand, I am here to tell you that this is nonsense. I will not blame inexperienced young people who believe in such nonsense. we will fix it
There are a lot of very good reasons why seniors will be buying a lot of Christmas toys and gifts online this year. The main reasons are convenience and getting more for less money.
(I apologize for the long article. I realize some of the younger people may lose interest and not make it to the end. Well, that just made this article even longer.)
Convenience
Okay, I’ll be the first geezer, er, retiree, to admit that shopping for Christmas gifts and toys the traditional way is a bummer; breaks my mood.
Christmas Shopping Saga: Here is a Christmas gift shopping saga. Everything has happened to me, but I admit it, not everything in a single trip:
Traffic: I hate traffic. Like a black hole in space, time slows down the closer you get to the mall or megastore. Cars are everywhere and parking spaces seem to be nowhere. Expect! One just opened! No! That little hybrid just went up and took the spot.
Parking: After an hour of fruitless hunting and stalking, I finally find a parking spot that is at the far end of the parking lot, so far from the store that I need a GPS to find it and a GPS to find my way back for hours more afternoon when I have forgotten where my car is.
Getting to the store: As I head to the store, I have to fight other drivers who are so focused on looking for ghost parking spots that they don’t notice me. I’ve never been a fan of the way parking lots mix people and cars.
The crowd: I arrive at the store. Behold the dreaded crowd! I see there must be a pitchfork and torch sale this year. The mob’s mood takes a sinister turn when a store opens its doors. Those who have camped out overnight wake up drowsy to find that a group of last-minute people have just walked into the store and gobbled up the new shipment of Christmas toys they’ve been waiting for.
Inside the packed store, there is pure madness served up with a jigger of pandemonium. Everyone is looking for Christmas gifts or toys. I push my way through groups of people who are twice as wide as normal because of their loot-filled shopping bags.
Leftovers: In the distance, I see the Christmas toy I want, but the remaining supply is running dangerously low. As I get closer, I see first one, then another, snatched away by hands closer than mine. By the time I fight my way through, one is left, on the ground, half open, parts hanging off. Like 3am at the bar this one looks pretty good so I grab it.
The line: So it’s more about sniping, er, buying more toys and Christmas presents. Hours later, with a weary sigh, I head to the register with my Christmas presents in hand. It doesn’t seem so bad at first, but oh no, the check-in line looks like the line for housing vouchers in the Atlanta area a few weeks ago. Somber doctors with bottled water and smelling salts await those who aren’t up to the challenge (okay, no doctors).
Checkout: Finally, feeling completely drained, it’s my turn at the register to pay for my Christmas presents. Do I have a membership card? I want one? Do I want an extended warranty plan? I want batteries? The sign above says “NO RECEIPT-NO REFUNDS-30 DAYS”. I offer my credit card. The clerk grumbles that I should swipe it on the card reader. Stupid of me. I forgot it. The crowd looks at me because I’m an obvious newbie and I’m holding up the line. People start pointing at me.
The Gate Keeper: I keep my receipt in my pocket considering the sign above. I reach the door but a burly guy blocks my path. “Not so fast, man,” he yells. “Where’s your receipt?” So, disgusted, I reach into my pocket and show the good man my receipt. He looks at it suspiciously, checks it once, checks it twice. Will he find Me naughty or nice? Reluctantly, he finds nothing wrong, blinks, and hands the receipt back to me. So much for the dignity of being an old man.
A breath of fresh air: Finally, I walk out the door that buzzes. Fresh air greets me. I didn’t realize how hot and humid it was inside. And it smells better outside too. Well, it smells better until a Bronco idling past filled with Christmas toys, waiting for something. A girl in front of me lights a cigarette, filling my lungs with secondhand nicotine and exhaust fumes.
The Gate Keeper: I keep my receipt in my pocket considering the sign above. I reach the door but a burly guy blocks my path. “Not so fast, man,” he yells. “Where’s your receipt?” So, disgusted, I reach into my pocket and show the good man my receipt. He looks at it suspiciously, checks it once, checks it twice. Will he find Me naughty or nice? Reluctantly, he finds nothing wrong, blinks, and hands the receipt back to me. So much for the dignity of being an old man.
A breath of fresh air: Finally, I walk out the door that buzzes. Fresh air greets me. I didn’t realize how hot and humid it was inside. And it smells better outside too. Well, it smells better until a Bronco idling past filled with Christmas toys, waiting for something. A girl in front of me lights a cigarette, filling my lungs with secondhand nicotine and exhaust fumes.
The Gate Keeper: I keep my receipt in my pocket considering the sign above. I reach the door but a burly guy blocks my path. “Not so fast, man,” he yells. “Where’s your receipt?” So, disgusted, I reach into my pocket and show the good man my receipt. He looks at it suspiciously, checks it once, checks it twice. Will he find Me naughty or nice? Reluctantly, he finds nothing wrong, blinks, and hands the receipt back to me. So much for the dignity of being an old man.
A breath of fresh air: Finally, I walk out the door that buzzes. Fresh air greets me. I didn’t realize how hot and humid it was inside. And it smells better outside too. Well, it smells better until a Bronco idling past filled with Christmas toys, waiting for something. A girl in front of me lights a cigarette, filling my lungs with secondhand nicotine and exhaust fumes.
